i don't think i have ever been this uncomfortable in my own skin.
i'm constantly trying to hide myself now.
i hate this.
Sunday, November 21, 2010
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
looking back on posts from last year on this blog and on tumblr, i hardly recognize that person anymore.
i had to go through and delete my old booths on dailybooth because it made me sick to look at that person.
i'm too different now. but not in a bad way. at least i don't think so.
i'm hardened, that's for sure. but i don't see that as a negative quality. i'd like to think i'm smarter now; that i've lost a good chuck of my naivety. the world is mean. people are heartless and rarely want what's best for you. i spent too much time letting my guard down and allowing people to take advantage of me. i don't want to be that weak anymore.
i still love whole-heartedly, even if i don't show it in the same ways. i ache for people to find happiness within their lives and i try to make things as easy as possible. i try to stay out of the way. granted, i fail frequently and end up in the center balancing various ends of the spectrum, but i'm okay with that. for now.
actually, i think i'll be okay with that forever. i'm really happy with where i am lately. i love that i'm finally over him and that i can go most days of the week without thinking about him. it's so freeing.
[so i can't blame you for your blog because if it brought you any of the same release that i'm feeling, it was incredibly overdue.]
i miss things in the past, but i've accepted that change is what life is about. nothing is ever stationery. everything is constantly changing and moving and evolving. and that is okay.
it is okay.
i had to go through and delete my old booths on dailybooth because it made me sick to look at that person.
i'm too different now. but not in a bad way. at least i don't think so.
i'm hardened, that's for sure. but i don't see that as a negative quality. i'd like to think i'm smarter now; that i've lost a good chuck of my naivety. the world is mean. people are heartless and rarely want what's best for you. i spent too much time letting my guard down and allowing people to take advantage of me. i don't want to be that weak anymore.
i still love whole-heartedly, even if i don't show it in the same ways. i ache for people to find happiness within their lives and i try to make things as easy as possible. i try to stay out of the way. granted, i fail frequently and end up in the center balancing various ends of the spectrum, but i'm okay with that. for now.
actually, i think i'll be okay with that forever. i'm really happy with where i am lately. i love that i'm finally over him and that i can go most days of the week without thinking about him. it's so freeing.
[so i can't blame you for your blog because if it brought you any of the same release that i'm feeling, it was incredibly overdue.]
i miss things in the past, but i've accepted that change is what life is about. nothing is ever stationery. everything is constantly changing and moving and evolving. and that is okay.
it is okay.
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
Sunday, October 10, 2010
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
september 14, 2010
i wrote out this really long post about the way my head works sometimes.
i deleted it.
i didn't feel like revealing that much.
i deleted it.
i didn't feel like revealing that much.
Sunday, September 12, 2010
september 12, 2010
i don't feel like saying much.
mom left this morning. and we cried, like always.
we were up early and i could have gone back to sleep, but that didn't happen.
work was easy today. and the vmas are making me smile.
i have pie. i'll probably eat some and then pass out on the couch.
i'd love to have someone to cuddle with.
mom left this morning. and we cried, like always.
we were up early and i could have gone back to sleep, but that didn't happen.
work was easy today. and the vmas are making me smile.
i have pie. i'll probably eat some and then pass out on the couch.
i'd love to have someone to cuddle with.
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